This peculiar thing/feeling happens every time. I know it’s coming but it takes me by surprise every single time. It just happened again today… Keep reading.
I look forward to my kids coming home. Don’t laugh, honestly…I do. (And this always means Neil, Margaret, and the girls will be dropping by more than usual as well.) I do the “normal” things you know, like everyone else with “adult” kids. I go to Publix a gazillion times. I pick up pretty flowers. I make sure there are clean sheets on the beds and clean towels in the bathroom. I put a fresh roll of toilet paper on the spindle and I buy a lot of fancy red wine. I wash my hair, shave my legs, and wait for their arrival. I am the happiest when all my kids are in the same room as me.
This year our Christmas had one of those unexpected turns. Well, for Graham and Mercy anyway.
Let me start by taking a few steps back… this young girl came into my son’s life several years ago. Mercy, my now beautiful daughter in law, moved from her country in Micronesia to Georgia, to be with my son. She left her Aunts, Uncles, her cousins, a brother, and her Mother. She was happy and her mother, Terry, was happy for her. As a Mom having children 5 hours away from me…(door to door), I get it, but geographically nobody could possibly be living farther apart than Mercy and her Mom. And that alone is unimaginable. Graham and Mercy got a phone call on Dec. 21st and jumped on a plane to Yap (where Mercy is from) on Dec. 23rd. Mercy made it in time to see her Mother smile once more and said goodbye to her forever on Dec. 28th. Mercy is 24. Too young to lose her Mom.
Back here…Gary and I stayed home on Christmas Day with EmmyLou and Georgie. (happy to do so…kinda) Georgie is Graham and Mercy’s 4-month-old pup. (I mentioned in my last blog) And although Georgie could not be ANY cuter, sweeter, or easier…keeping TWO dogs fed three times a day, TWO dogs “potty trained” multiple times a day, and taking TWO dogs for long walks in the woods about did us in! Yet…in the meantime…EmmyLou (our little doodle) fell hopelessly and madly in love. The feeling was mutual. Those black and white paws were constantly entangled! Growls of nipping at noses and biting at ears and the spontaneous games of tug of war and hide and seek were unstoppable. Finally, loud grunts of exhaustion …it is the end of the day (6:00 pm to be exact… “happy hour” for a whole new reason) and the cuteness transcended upon us as these creatures spooned into their resting place and were breathing simultaneously, and peace was ever-present. Our job was done…until 6:00 am that is.
Graham and Mercy landed in Atlanta and drove here last night. I was so happy to see them. They have had days of no rest. They were tired, as you can imagine! Neil, Margaret, and the girls came by of course. We had dinner and talked for a while about the traditions of the Yapese culture. Her mother’s special service. We talked about Mercy’s family and Mercy’s Mom. How EVERYONE was there to help. How everyone in her village loved and respected her Mom and like Mercy, how she gave to others and expected nothing in return. Friends and relatives gave their money, their time, and their love for Mercy. And I’m glad she had Graham by her side. A few hours ago they got in their car and were gone again… back to Savannah with sweet Georgie.
The feeling came immediately. Like I said…it never fails. I’m missing them before they get out of sight. The quietness is too sudden. I want someone to yell MOM!! I want to yell WHAT?? I want to hear children and adults…needing one another for absolutely nothing. I want to hear giggling, screaming, or even obnoxious growling and barking! Peace is so overrated! I want to hear family.
I finally get a grip…in a few days or a few weeks or maybe a month or so…they will be back!
And how I pray you can hear all the noise in heaven Terry!
We love you Mercy!
Keep Your Hat ON!
I totally understand. Loved this so mych!
Andrea the quiet before the storm is almost worse! All the anticipation… It truly is only about being together. And that is clear as a bell once they are pulling out of my driveway! Hugs to you in 2020!
Your blog is so great! Love you friend and prayers for sweet Mercy!🙏♥️🙏♥️
Thank you, Jane. Graham is one lucky man! She is a saint! And “WE” let him know it!
Tears streaming!
I LOVE LOVE LOVE making people cry! Thanks, Callie, best compliment ever! But I know you cry (like me) at a Christmas commercial on TV!
I really enjoyed reading this blog and I feel the same way about all the family at home and then all the quietness.
But if you open a window…You can hear yours! haha!
Especially after a long visit during the Holidays…You take a deep breath as they arrive, and a big sigh when they leave…it is always emotional!
Sweetest blog. Mercy (and myself) are lucky to have gracy in our lives:).
Careful what you wish for…. I am happy to bring my kids over EVERYDAY this week 😜☺️
The word “blessed” is somewhat redundant…But pretty fitting when it comes to ALL of the “IN-LAWS” in my life! That alone is a ton to “wish for”!
My door is always open!! (I just may be on a girl trip…hahaha)!
I love this so much ! Forever missing my mother in law terry ❤️
I want Mercy to share all the stories of growing up with Terry in Yap to us always. The memories are so fascinating and full of love. Strong, giving, loving women that have so much to teach us. My heart breaks for all. Love and prayers!
I wish I could have met Terry, but knowing Mercy, I can only imagine how kind she was. This was a very sweet blog, Mom! Props, as always!
I have a feeling Terry was an Angel like Ganny and Mama Tori…I wish I had known her as well.
This is beautiful and as always, so well written. Living so close to Morgan, John, and Kennedy, I totally get it! If we go for two days without seeing them, we go nuts!
Carole your “move” was the smartest move of your life! You haven’t missed a beat! Well worth packing up for huh? I love your pictures and of all that winter white….so appropriate for a guy named Whitey!
What you can do with your words is just amazing! All of your family is lucky to have such a wonderful bond, and that includes EmmyLou and Georgie. I’m sure Terry was lucky to have the Gaines in her world as well. So sweet!!
Aw shucks Fran. I will say the “needs” of two pups were a great distracter from the worrying that was going through this frail brain of mine.
I DO NOT KNOW HOW YOU DO IT????
I know the feeling…”Phew everyone is gone!!! Finally!!! I can sit down and rest”. I get still and the silence becomes deafening sadness and longing fill the void. I’m so sorry for Mercy. I’m so glad she was able to get there and be with her Mama. What a blessing that was.
I believe …because sometimes God takes the wheel. And everything is ok. This was HIS plan.
Sweetest blog. You captured the sentimental season. We’re never ready to say good bye to our moms.
I’m so glad Mercy was there with her sweet Mom…It is so sad, but wonderful memories to share forever!
Oh teardrops and then….sobs. Sooo very sweet. I totally relate to your feelings of noise of family. Mercy lost her Mom too soon we think but I suppose the angels needed her. That’s why G-d had you already in place down here Tracy. Not to replace Terry but to give Mercy more well deserved moments of motherly love. Such a beautiful post Tracy.
Sometimes I’m taken back by how “things work themselves out”…but they don’t. God’s hand is in it the whole time! I have seen many miracles in my 65 years. Thank you for your kind words Gilda!
You nailed it!!!! Love to have them all home! It’s the best feeling in the world.
Then, to get your home back to yourself is priceless. Another best feeling!
I’m sure that they all feel the same way once they get back home!!
A fun place to visit, but wouldn’t want to live there…..anymore.
I remember so well visiting my parents with three small kids. When I got back to Gainesville I would call home (collect) and ask my Mom, “Do you miss us?” and she would always say, “You miss the itch after you have had it a while!”
I get it!
Tracy, Thank you for sharing your thoughts and emotions with us in a beautifully written piece.
The quiet, relatively clean house and the empty refrigerator all say the kids have left the building…..and I miss them so.
I am sorry for Mercy’s loss, nothing harder, but happy she’s a part of your family and know she’ll be wrapped in love.
Thanks for your comment, Mary. We are so proud to have this sweet sweet soul in our family…and perfectly suited for Graham, for sure! I’m sure it confuses her with ALL the sarcasm that flies around this household…but she is “catching on”!
Very touching and special for Mercy, I’m sure !
Thanks, Mrs. Milcich…Mom’s are something else, aren’t they! Love you and Miss you so much!
Your blog is spot on girl. I Think most people feel the way you do…We have 4 grandboys under 3 and it’s total Chaos when they come but so much fun! So Happy Mercy made it home in time to see her mother before she passed. God was with her in that!
Hi Kathy,
The chaos is never-ending, the refrigerator is hard to keep full, the toys, puzzles, crayons are everywhere…so why am I so sad when they go home? I know they will be right back. I take a deep breath and pour a deeper glass of wine, and it’s all good again.